Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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