Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Randomize
