What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Randomize
