I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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