He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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