Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Randomize