she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
