She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
