I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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