it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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