I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
