I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
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