i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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