PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
