I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
he shaved USA in his pubs
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
