He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
