mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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