it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
