So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
