How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
...so i touched it.
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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