I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
