This girl is more easily done than said...
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
