the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
