He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Randomize
