I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
