are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
