So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Randomize
