Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
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