it's too hot outside to masturbate.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
