I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
