ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
