I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I CAN MOONWALK!
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
