Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
