I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
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