He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
