anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Randomize
