If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize