Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
You need a sexual gate keeper
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
