your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
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