Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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