How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
