seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
