Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize
