don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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