It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
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