Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
