i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
