also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Randomize
