dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
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