You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
