Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Randomize