Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Randomize
